SPEAKER_00 0:16

Hi. I didn't do makeup. I didn't do nothing. The first time you ever put a video on.

SPEAKER_02 0:24

Look at this. Couldn't warn me.

SPEAKER_00 0:26

I just like your background though.

SPEAKER_02 0:28

Wish you could see my uh my other cake. Cake, cake, cake, cake. Shout out at crappy cake art and pumpkin spice.

SPEAKER_01 0:38

Because it's pumpkin spice season. We both got the notification that pumpkin spice was back and we both went running.

SPEAKER_02 0:45

Ashley went yesterday and they were like, tomorrow. And I like left the drive-thru. I was like, okay, thanks. I'll be back tomorrow. Welcome, welcome.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

Alrighty. Ashley, I've got a question. So we you've paid the vendor. Oh my gosh, well, then I've already made a mistake. All right, okay. Ashley, I've got a question. Okay. So you paid the venue, you've paid the photographer, you've paid the DJ and the florist and your hair and makeup team. And somebody says, Don't forget to tip your vendors. What do you say? To a bride and groom that was just told all of that, and now they just learned that they have to know tip vendors. Like, how do we navigate the tipping culture for vendors?

SPEAKER_02 1:33

So this is what I've always said. And a lot of my peers will agree with me that I've seen, you know, answering posts like that. Tipping is always appreciated. You know, we're never gonna be like, no, you know, we we really appreciate the acknowledgement of the work that goes into their day, but it's not expected. I don't expect anybody to tip me. Correct. And if I do get tipped, I'm usually if they haven't like set a separate amount aside for my second, I'm usually like splitting whatever they give. So I think it's interesting because we've like right after COVID, it was like every single wedding I got tipped. I think the most I've ever been tipped was like seven or eight hundred dollars. Wow, I was not working for myself on that wedding. I feel like right after COVID, we were seeing tips like almost every wedding. And then as the years have gone by since then, like last year, I feel like tips were really like less and less. I don't know. I'm trying not to say it as like a big thing. Yeah, I just think we saw it less last year and this year.

SPEAKER_01 2:55

I I'm I haven't gotten one single tip this year.

SPEAKER_02 2:59

I have we have gotten tips this year.

SPEAKER_01 3:02

And not again, it's not in a bad way, but I feel like you used to see it all the time, and now it's slowly getting into like less and less.

SPEAKER_02 3:11

I think people should do whatever makes sense for them. I've set my prices so that I know what I'm getting paid and I'm good with it. All people see is that oh, I start at around $6,200 or whatever. Some people like there's this somebody that I know in England, and I know that like pricing for vendors over there is a lot less expensive than here. I don't know why. The way that he like talked about my pricing, but I don't keep $6,200. Like I have to pay taxes, that's 30%. And then after taxes, I have to make sure that my business expenses are covered. Your equipment in case it gets damaged, or and then I also have to pay the second photographer. I'm not only am I working like eight or nine hours on the wedding day, but I'm working up until the wedding day. Any calls, engagement sessions, you know, timeline planning, things like that. If I visit the venue with them, and then after the wedding is like the most amount of hours that goes into it. I just think like it's easy to look at the whole number and be like, oh, this is like so much, but that's actually not like what I'm taking home. Any other photographer that's legally operating is not just like pocketing all that money.

SPEAKER_01 4:44

That's how like with the content creator that I have for my wedding. I unfortunately am not getting the owner, which I'm so sad about. I freaking love her, but I'm getting her associate, which she's also amazing too. Like, I've seen tons of tons of her work, but let alone am I paying the business, uh, she has to pay her associate to be there all day. So like she's not walking away with what I'm paying them either.

SPEAKER_02 5:10

Right.

SPEAKER_01 5:11

And I just feel like there's this. Don't get me wrong, it was really nice getting all these tips because it felt like oh, they're seeing your work, they're seeing appreciated. But this year, like I said, I haven't gotten a single, single tip, I've gotten an envelope with just like a card in there, and then I did have one where I give like a little care package, which is cute. It had like a Diet Coke chips and then like a card in there. That was cute, and trust me, that was all gone by the end of the night, but it didn't last, and I thought that was kind of cute versus like just giving straight money. I also think it just depends on kind of what vendor you are, yeah, which ones you should be tipping versus not tipping, right?

SPEAKER_02 5:54

Like, obviously, food service I would expect to be getting tipped.

SPEAKER_01 5:58

Correct. Well, see, that's like with me, it's always so hard because with us being a venue with food, we have gratuity built in. But that gratuity doesn't go to me. That gratuity goes to the servers. So I'm always like when people ask me, I'm like, technically, I don't get that gratuity. Like, I'm salary, I'm here, I work my hours, I this is my job, this is my duties. Like the gratuity is for the servers, but that's not all venues, right? Some venues are like that. The coordinator gets part of that gratuity, so the staff gets lower, but I don't. So when people always ask me, I'm like, oh, it's always appreciative because again, I'm just salary-based, just sticking her whole tongue out.

SPEAKER_02 6:42

Sorry, you're laughing at my kitten.

SPEAKER_01 6:45

Don't be wrong, getting tips for me, it's nice because I'm not into that tips that I see that the we we give the servers, but then there's also venues where there's a service fee, and then you still have to tip on top of that, which I don't understand that would.

SPEAKER_02 7:00

We've talked about that before.

SPEAKER_01 7:01

The service fee.

SPEAKER_02 7:03

I wish that we lived in a world where people just got paid appropriately. Then I think tipping wouldn't be such a big, like, controversial because like the couples spend all this money, and then people are like, Oh, did you tip your vendors?

SPEAKER_01 7:18

And then it gets into that, like, oh, should I be spent like should I go get cash out for more? Should I be doing that? You know, I do think a better way, and you can say for this too, is your business a better way than giving tip is writing a review. Yes, I agree with that, and posting, posting, like posting about all of your vendors, thanking all your vendors publicly, and then making a really nice review. I think that speaks more than giving a cash tip because people read reviews when they're booking vendors, and definitely venues. I get it all the time at work. People are like, oh, I saw all the reviews with your name in it, and I'm like, Thank you. Awkward, like I'm like, oh, awkward, but like, yeah, because they see it. And I do I ask for that review, obviously, but I'm not asking them to the contents in it, it's up to them to write what they want. But I feel like that also definitely helps with vendors, it also helps with just showing you're doing a lot of weddings versus no weddings if you had zero reviews, but you've been doing hundreds of weddings a year.

SPEAKER_02 8:24

I mean, I don't always get reviewed, but I'm really shy, so I don't usually ask unless I feel really close with my I don't know why, I just get so shy.

SPEAKER_01 8:37

I feel weird. I just think that's a way better way of appreciating your vendors and posting on Instagram all of your vendors with all of them tagged. It doesn't have to be like an individual one, but that also because there's might be two brides that are following you and they see your photos and they see okay, well, this bride had these vendors, so they must really trust them, and then they have it, and then they re then that can get somebody else another wedding from there. It's just I feel like as somebody who's starting to pay all their bills right now, thinking about tipping is an absolute crazy to me, it's insane, the whole thought process and expectations. Or I feel like if you are gonna tip your vendors, which a planner friend of mine actually told me this, and when I do daya for her, I live by it. I don't give the tips out till the end of the night. Because what if you tipped your DJ and they sucked and they played your do not playlist, they didn't get everybody on the dance floor, but you just gave them $200.

SPEAKER_02 9:41

That's usually when I get the tips, is at the end of the night.

SPEAKER_01 9:44

I I see sometimes all of the beginning. They'll do it in the morning when all of the not in the morning, but like when they all arrive as they see them, they'll just hand it to them to get so they don't forget. But that's why a coordinator is really nice because a coordinator does it at the end of the night, and that's when you can say because that there has been time where I didn't give somebody a tip because the bride was like having such a difficult time with this vendor, and it was terrible. And I looked at her and I said, I'm not giving this tip back to the vendor, like I'm giving it back to you. I said, They don't deserve this after everything you've gone through today. And she's like, You know what? Thank you from saving. At least I got my money back, yeah, from it. Because think about like they just probably he spent all his money on the actual vendor because it's in that contracted price, and then on top of it, you were about to tip them more, but they gave you so much trouble the entire day.

SPEAKER_02 10:34

What kind of vendor wasn't it?

SPEAKER_01 10:36

Photographer.

SPEAKER_02 10:39

That aches me. It's definitely something to think about, and uh ultimately it's up to the couple, you know, and what they're the most comfortable with or what they feel like is I like personal bits.

SPEAKER_01 10:51

I've gotten one a birthday gift. Oh, that's cute. I always work a wedding on my birthday, so I love when they give me a little gift, like be like I have this one bride get me those musshmallows, smushmellows, what the little stuffed animals.

SPEAKER_02 11:05

A smushmallow?

SPEAKER_01 11:06

A s I don't know, smushmallow, something like squishmallow, squishmallow, but it was of like a dinosaur. I'm not a dinosaur, I'm pursing, but I still have it to this day. It's where all my stuffed animals are. That's cute. Because it was a thought that counts, and she gave it to me on my birthday because I was working her wedding. I mean, this thing is huge, like it's the big one, it's not like the little baby ones, like it's the large, large ones. And she walked into the bridal suite with this big bag and it said happy birthday on it. And she's like, Here, happy birthday. And I was like, Girl, it is first of all eight o'clock in the morning. I am not awake. How are you awake? How are you this awake? And then she was like, Here's your birthday gift, and then again, it's obviously it's a dinosaur, like it's a purple and blue dinosaur, and but I still love it, even though it's not my style of stuffed animals. I'll always have that because I thought that was really cool. Yeah, and she took time to go get it. And the bride that gave us like the chips, the diet coke, and like the letter, and it was in like a bag that was printed with a venue on it. That was cute.

SPEAKER_02 12:11

I like that. It's thoughtful, and but I have to agree that I would always take a review, a nice sweet review of your getting tipped. If there was gonna be an option, you know, if I had to pick every time it would be a review. I'm appreciative of whatever, I don't expect anything from anyone. They paid me. What I care about is that they're gonna have their photos of their day.

SPEAKER_01 12:41

I think every vendor has their own gratification part of the day. That makes sense, like the florals when they walk in and they do a room reveal and you get the video, if you're not there to see it, of them seeing the space for the first time of the florals. For them, that smile, that happiness, even if there's tears, that's their okay. I did my job, exactly what I they wanted. And then for you, it's to see the photos them posting all the time. Obviously, they love it, and then just their happiness throughout the day. Mine is at the end of the night, and sometimes when they're so drunk, it's the best part because they're so thankful, and I'm literally like, Oh my god, it's so amazing! You did so and they're like sloppy hugging me, and I'm like, that to me means that they had a good night. To me, that is that's cute. I have had a couple where they don't really drink that much, but that it's okay, you don't have to. My favorite is when they are at that stage where they are sloppy thinking me because I know that they're so thankful and they're so happy. That's cute, and I think that makes my heart be like, Okay, cool, I can do another one tomorrow.

SPEAKER_02 13:52

Oh my god, another one. I have a couple back-to-backs this year coming up.

SPEAKER_01 13:57

The same couple, or am I just dumb right now?

SPEAKER_02 14:00

No, like I have multiple weddings over a weekend.

SPEAKER_01 14:03

My brain just was like constituteous. I think the only ones who I feel like should be tipped are catering and service staff, bartenders. Because the bartenders, they can make your night. Not because of the tips that they're you're giving, but just they can make your night. They they run your party. Um, and then hair and makeup. I think that's very custom to do hair and makeup, but like on mine, it's in my contract. They already put it on at the end before we even pay them the gratuities added to it. You need to add the cat bed right here instead. Newest member of the podcast. If you hear purring in the background, it's all her. That's the third member of the podcast. Yeah, I think those are the only three that I would say you should.

SPEAKER_02 14:53

They also say typically, if you are working with a company who hires out DJs or hires out photographers or video people or whatever, they say it's customary to tip those people because they're not the owner of the business.

SPEAKER_01 15:08

You hire a DJ company, but then you have a DJ underneath it. Like a something small. Doesn't have to be 20% of the bill, in a sense. No, but it can definitely be a nice gesture.

SPEAKER_02 15:19

I would say I see typically is like 150.

SPEAKER_01 15:23

One wedding was 300. Working at the venue I'm at. When I worked as a caner company, that's a different story. I got a really nice one from a wedding. But as the venue I'm at, the most I think I've gotten is like three, I want to say like 300. I'm I normally see 50 to 100, which is like normal. But I honestly, like, give me the chips and a Diet Coke and a smokers, whatever those sandwiches are. Give me that over anything else. But I mean, if you have late-night tacos, my butt just might stay a little longer. So I can eat a taco.

SPEAKER_02 16:05

That's the thing. It's like, it's not like we're not like if we'll find our own little treats throughout the night.

SPEAKER_01 16:11

The bride and groom were like, I don't know if we want to do a late night snack, and the planner goes, Do you want Jessica to stay for your whole entire night? Add tacos. They're like, Okay, tacos. And I was like, guys, don't really add it if you don't want it. If that's the late night snack you like, then we'll do it. I'm like, oh my gosh, I sound this like entitled person over here, and I'm absolutely not. I just really like the tacos. I just really like the tacos. That's cute. I heard somebody say this, oh, should I be tipping my vendors? And that has stuck in it through this entire process. Like, should you be, should you not be?

SPEAKER_02 16:42

Right.

SPEAKER_01 16:43

What's customary, what's not customary, because you know, even in non-wedding related tipping, it is getting out of hand. You go to a coffee shop where they're making you a coffee and they're asking you for a tip after you paid with your card. You know, they used to never do that. Tipping culture in general has been really high. So I think in the wedding industry, we're seeing that switch into not as much tipping.

SPEAKER_02 17:10

I understand like the argument behind it in everyday circumstances, but just don't tip if you don't, you know what I mean? This is not something that I can get passionate about because there's so much else that's an issue that like the easiest way to go around it is just not doing it. Press out or no. I'm sure are some people taking advantage.

SPEAKER_01 17:33

I don't think your vendor, and if we're going back to the wedding version, I don't think vendors are gonna be upset with a couple or not like the couple if they don't tip them.

SPEAKER_02 17:42

If they do, then they're not a good vendor, they're not in the business for the right reasons.

SPEAKER_01 17:47

Correct. Like I said, this whole year I've gotten no physical cash tip, and I have not once been upset about it. Have we had a conversation? Because we normally get a couple of them, and then we split it as a team, but we were kind of having that conversation. We're like, oh well, we really haven't gotten any this year. And we're both like, oh yeah, that's kind of interesting. But then we're saying they're like, if we were them, would we be tipping? Thank you for opening up the tipping file today. I know it was a short little episode, but hope this helps any brides out there who are currently getting to their big day and trying to figure out if they should or should not be tipping. We'll see you next time on the aisle files.

SPEAKER_02 18:30

Bye. Let us know in the comments if you tip.

SPEAKER_00 18:34

Okay, bye.